If you’re enjoying The Knockbox, please donate to our Patreon to help us roast the coffee industry seven days a week. Coffee lovers across the United States and beyond were severely bored today as one popular hyper-niche coffee satire website ran an incredibly boring PBS-style pledge drive in order to guilt casual enjoyers of the site into pledging…
This piece is dedicated to Mat North, our first ever Patreon supporter whom we will always cherish. Eternal shoutouts. OKLAHOMA CITY, OK— Baristas at a local shop were in for a surprise when new patron Donald Mullen, who at first seemed much like any other cafe customer, made sure to let them know that because he used to…
LOS ANGELES, CA— This weekend saw the launch of a brand-new venture that promises a veritable utopia for service workers everywhere: a customer-free cafe. The cafe, which is for baristas only, will be run as a collective by a group of veteran LA spro-slingers. Our reporters attended the soft opening this weekend and caught up with the cafe…
BOSTON, MA— Local roaster Kent Dunney is out of work this week after lifting an entire 154 lb bag of green coffee and hurting his back. Our reporters visited Dunney in his apartment, where it was immediately clear that he had been binging Netflix’s newest releases and eating takeout during his recuperation. He seemed in good spirits considering the…
All across the United States, coffee lovers are looking at their phones and laughing, but also thinking about real issues that affect the specialty coffee world. All of this comes courtesy of new Instagram coffee meme account CM Puck, an account which takes a deep and unflinching look into the challenges faced at all levels of the supply chain…
WICHITA, KS— Barista Sara Katz was devastated this morning after finally tasting coffee cherries for the first time and discovering that they are, in fact, only moderately delicious when compared to actual coffee. At the time of the fateful tasting, Katz had been working in coffee for four years and wanted to taste actual dried coffee cherries, also…
SAN FRANCISCO, CA— Local customer Brian Dean received some serious shade today after making a joke about the fact that he didn’t intend to tip—a fateful decision which would permanently alter the course of his week. When Dean went to get his morning coffee from his usual shop, he was feeling especially gregarious. While being rung up, he…
CINCINNATI, OH— This morning, ambitious barista Sarah Metcalf proudly showed coworkers the expensive new specialty tamper she had custom-purchased online, just before dropping it on the floor and ruining the base. Metcalf, who has worked as a barista for three years and describes herself as “very passionate,” purchased the new tamper (a tool that compacts espresso grounds before…
PORTLAND, OR— This weekend in Portland, two local companies joined forces to create a new coffee stout. This union presented an occasion for excitement in the local coffee and beer communities and was feted at a launch party this Saturday. Knockbox reporters hit the scene to see what the buzz was all about. Event attendees had a lot…
SAN DIEGO, CA— This weekend at one San Diego cafe, drama exploded as the barista who “never sweeps” raised a complaint about no one else ever sweeping. According to witnesses, the staff meeting was progressing as planned, the necessary announcements having been dispatched, until individual members of the group were invited to bring up issues. Maura Jackson, who…