Frustration reigned supreme on Saturday morning when Gladys Albrecht, who was in the area visiting her adult son, joined him for coffee at his favorite cafe, only to find that the “pretentious” establishment wasn’t serving anything that she likes.
Category: Education
Coffee Shop Serves Doppio But Unsure What It Does
A small group of baristas in a coffee shop just outside a local mall are trying to shake things up in their coffee-traditional city.
Food Journalist Writes Uninformed Coffee Article
Earlier today, nationally-renowned food journalist Russ Dewitt published a controversial article on the specialty coffee industry. The piece, which criticized specialty coffee shops for charging too much for coffee, consulted no specialty coffee professionals or coffee farmers, included no apparent research into the subject at hand, and was, in fact, based on almost nothing.
New Barista Miraculously Dials In Espresso Despite Forgetting Extraction Theory
This piece is dedicated to Weihong Zhang, our excellent Patreon supporter whom we love and appreciate. By Josh Rank DUBUQUE, IA– New hire Stephan Grant was shocked to find the espresso he had been dialing in didn’t taste like hot garbage despite having zero recollection of extraction theory. “It’s amazing,” said Grant. “It’s truly like Perger was watching over me.…
New “Indirect Trade” Ad Campaign Celebrates Opacity
This piece is dedicated to Eric Dong, our excellent Patreon supporter and contributor whom we love and appreciate. By Joe Marrocco A successful mid-sized coffee roaster based in Springfield recently launched a new marketing campaign geared around the concept of “Indirect Trade Coffee.” I was able to sit down and chat with co-owner Makara Lowry about this movement and the…
Mom Uses New Pourover Once, Reverts to Keurig
MORRISTOWN, NJ— According to recent reports, local mom Mary Schooner used the new pourover drip cone given to her by her son Michael once, before reverting to her tried-and-true Keurig. “It was a really nice gift,” she told the Knockbox. “Really, I love it!” Nevertheless, reports say, she used it once, while Michael was in the room,…
Roaster Learns So Much Every Day (From Listening to Podcasts)
PORTLAND, ME— Local roaster Pete Lopez learns so much every day he roasts coffee—mainly from listening to podcasts. “I’ve been so grateful to be able to learn to roast. Since then, I’ve never stopped learning; every day, I learn so much.” Most of this learning, he says, is from listening to podcasts while he mindlessly roasts according to…
Barista Thinks of Perfect Analogy for Microfoamed Milk
This piece is dedicated to Weihong Zhang, our excellent Patreon supporter whom we love and appreciate. By Nathanael May CHARLOTTE, NC— Eschewing the standard options of “melted ice cream” and “wet paint,” local barista and aspiring shift lead Braedyn Kellson discovered what she believed to be the perfect analogy for teaching new baristas the expected texture of properly steamed…
Study Shows 97% of Baristas Laugh at the Term “Cupping” the First Time they Hear it
DAVIS, CA— A new study released by UC Davis’s Coffee Campus this morning shows a shocking trend: an average of 97% of baristas laugh at the term “cupping” the first time they hear it. According to the report, the term “cupping,” which coffee professionals use to refer to a simple and standardized immersion brew used for assessing quality,…
At ASIC Conference, Science Experts Strongly Recommend Measuring Shit
PORTLAND, OR— Last week, the Association for Science and Information on Coffee (ASIC) held its 27th biennial conference in Portland and shone a light on several critical issues affecting the future of coffee. Overall, they say, we as an industry really, really need to start measuring shit. “As an industry, it’s super important that we work at consistently…