OKLAHOMA CITY, OK— A local cafe chain is implementing a new anti-bias training program to teach baristas to respect coffees of all roast levels. While many are skeptical of the efficacy of anti-bias trainings, owner Helen Jones believes that it’s a necessary first step in eliminating bias not only in baristas, but in the wider community. “In third-wave coffee shops.…
PORTLAND, OR— This morning, a popular vegan cafe is enveloped in an angry horde of vegans protesting the cafe’s use of human labor. Fighting our way through handmade signs reading “End Vegan Hypocrisy” and “Stop Exploiting ALL Animals,” we got on the scene to investigate. “Humans are animals, too,” protester Eric Patton told us heatedly, pushing his blonde dreads out…
RICHMOND, VA— Everything came to a halt at one Richmond cafe this morning as barista Terry Kyler made his coworker take a super cool picture of him throwing a latte so that it looked like he was using the force. “I really didn’t want to do it, but he just wouldn’t take no for an answer,” said barista…
By Chris Deferio KNOXVILLE, TN— Concerned customers and townspeople are milling about in confusion and wonder this morning after Lenny Welker, the closing barista at a local espresso bar, accidentally performed the perfect close and realized that the shop could never open again. Welker had been finishing the final item on the closing checklist when he realized…
This piece is dedicated to Michael Boyette, Patreon supporter and my uncle, whose coffee is the best. PHILADELPHIA, PA— This week, one barista’s uncle made headlines when he won the Northeast Regional Barista Championship using Folgers and his trusted Mr Coffee. “I work at a third-wave coffee shop. I know what good coffee is supposed to taste like. But when…
SAN FRANCISCO, CA— The Fourth of July was ruined for the crew of one local cafe when an overzealous guest wearing an Uncle Sam outfit walked around the shop for several hours calling all of the baristas and customers snowflakes and yelling the lyrics to “She’s a Grand Old Flag.” We got on the scene to investigate and…
By Robert Galbraith After four grueling days of tasting, winners were announced at this year’s Cup of Excellence competition yesterday afternoon, with seven of the top ten spots held by the much-celebrated Geisha variety. “We all cheered and gave each other high fives when we heard a Geisha had won. That it also went on to take…
This piece is dedicated to Nathanael May, one of our first Patreon supporters, to whom we are forever grateful. WASHINGTON, D.C.— A joyous day was had by all at one D.C. cafe last Saturday when several local patrons brought their dogs—all of whom were service dogs, not just pets—along for their weekend latte. All throughout the long summer…
If you’re enjoying The Knockbox, please donate to our Patreon to help us roast the coffee industry seven days a week. Coffee lovers across the United States and beyond were severely bored today as one popular hyper-niche coffee satire website ran an incredibly boring PBS-style pledge drive in order to guilt casual enjoyers of the site into pledging…
LOS ANGELES, CA— This weekend saw the launch of a brand-new venture that promises a veritable utopia for service workers everywhere: a customer-free cafe. The cafe, which is for baristas only, will be run as a collective by a group of veteran LA spro-slingers. Our reporters attended the soft opening this weekend and caught up with the cafe…