HONOLULU, HI— You’re probably familiar with cat cafes, but this week, a brand-new concept has emerged with the launch of Honolulu’s beautiful new bat cafe, which allows guests to cuddle with and even adopt adorable vampire bats. With a concept this original, we had to check it out for ourselves. We flew to Hawaii to attend the soft opening, anticipating some coffee, cuddles, and maybe even a new familiar to bring home.
As we arrived at the facade of the pristine white-tiled storefront, we could see the cafe’s signature fauna whirling around the shop through the large glass windows. As we waved at the proprietor and started opening the door, she frantically gestured for us to leave it closed.
We waited patiently and after a few minutes, the swarm settled and she waved us in. The cafe was a sight for our travel-weary eyes, brilliant white surfaces barely touched by guano. The proprietor introduced herself as Cindy Lee, explaining that the bats roost in the daytime, so she sets off a special frequency emitter on the hour to get them to wake up and cuddle with guests, during which time, guests cannot open the door.
“I’m beyond excited that we were actually able to make this dream come true,” said Lee, glowing with pride. “Bats really are the loveliest creatures and so many of them are in need of good homes.”
We got some coffee and spoke with a few guests to see if they’d be taking home any of the caped critters, who were roosting in clusters on the ceiling.
“I love them,” gushed Marine Chel, who lives in the neighborhood. “I’ll totally get my coffee here, and probably a bat as well!”
“I’m a biologist and this is not how bats are supposed to live,” said Mike Macklin, who had heard about the soft opening online. “It’s not right and it’s not safe.”
The hour struck and Lee called out the cue for Bat Time. I couldn’t hear the frequency from the button she pressed, but the bats immediately left their ceiling roost and started winging their way around the store, swooping low and shrieking. We soaked it all in until the bats settled back down, then headed to the beach for some sun.
The bat cafe was truly a delight. If you’re ever in the Honolulu area, you should definitely stop by and grab a coffee—and a Chiroptera if the spirit moves you.
Update: the store was shut down the following week by the health inspector and will not be reopening for the foreseeable future.
If you laughed, support The Knockbox with a monthly or one-time donation through our Patreon or Cashapp.
