By Sam Stoothoff
This piece is dedicated to the ever-excellent Morgan Russell, our Patreon supporter whom we appreciate.
ATLANTA, GA— Local barista Sean McAllister has been greeting everyone with “unusual warmth and compassion for the entirety of his shift,” according to reports. In a completely unrelated coincidence, he also happens to have run out of money until his next paycheck.
According to McCallister’s coworkers, about a half hour after his shift begins he will typically check out and express far less interest in the lives of customers. Today though, he was engaged and genuinely interested in patrons’ well-being and even refrained from checking his phone whenever humanly possible. Reports also suggest that tips were very good this morning.
Fellow baristas on shift were initially skeptical of McAllister’s change in demeanor. “It was kind of weird. Sean was smiling, telling everyone to have a nice day as they left,” coworker Susie Eberle told reporters. “He even put on super upbeat music instead of that bummer-ass Songs: Ohia band he’s been into lately.”
Our investigation revealed that by complete coincidence unrelated to his demeanor, McAllister had failed to remember that his student loan auto-payment was being withdrawn the day before.
As the day went on, McAllister was even seen bussing tables, which he apparently “never does,” and even went so far as asking customers how their drinks were.
By the end of his shift, McAllister reportedly made enough tip money to secure some cheap pizza, miscellaneous groceries, and took home several leftover croissants for dinner, although according to witnesses, he has expressed grave doubts that he can keep this up until payday.
Sam Stoothoff currently living the dream in Brooklyn. His credits include the occasional good tweet that can be found @sam_stache.
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