SAN FRANCISCO, CA— Local customer Brian Dean received some serious shade today after making a joke about the fact that he didn’t intend to tip—a fateful decision which would permanently alter the course of his week.
When Dean went to get his morning coffee from his usual shop, he was feeling especially gregarious. While being rung up, he made a remark that would dramatically alter his day: “Tip jar, huh? I won’t be needing that.”
Michael Mallah, the barista on shift at the time, was not amused. He finished the interaction politely but curtly and went to make the drink, throwing serious shade all the while.
“I couldn’t quite put my finger on it,” Dean told our reporters. “But for some reason, after I made that joke, I just didn’t feel so good anymore. I honestly felt kind of bad.”
We talked to Mallah to get the full story.
“That guy comes in every day and never tips,” he said. “It’s okay to not tip, but why make a joke about it? I would never say anything rude to him or in any way compromise his drink quality, but I do have to admit I was throwing some serious shade.”
Dean left the shop feeling slightly down and went on to feel inexplicably melancholy throughout the rest of the day. He reported feeling pretty okay the following morning, but still not quite back to normal.
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